November 12, 2012

30 Days Grateful: Day 12 - Grab the Remote and Press Play

As I lay my head to rest and my soul to sleep, I ponder upon what I am grateful for today.  You know sometimes your head can get stuffed with so much junk, you wonder how you can think.  Maybe you realize you don't know what you really are doing with your life.  Maybe some of the choices you have made were not the right ones.  The self-doubt starts roaming around lurking on the sidelines poking at ya.  Then to make matters worse, you find an old picture of your two elder girls when they were little and you're reminded the youngest of the two is not with you.  You realize she is miles away and it's been a few days since you've heard from her.

Now you are sad and stuffed with junk in your head.  You cry.  Of course you cry.  It hurts.  And you wonder why it has to be this way.  You know that's how life ticks.  You have kids, they grow up and leave home to live life on their own.  They don't need you as much any more.  You know this is how life rolls, but it doesn't stop the hurt.

You hold the picture in your hands and caress their little faces and wish really hard that you could go back to those years and hold them tight in your arms and never let them go.  Now you can't breathe because your nose is stuffed from so much crying.  So now, your sad, with a stuffy nose, self-doubt poking at you and a head stuffed with junk.

You realize, hey this is suppose to be a 'grateful for' post and not a self pity party.  You grab a Kleenex,  blow your nose, tell your head to shut up stifle, blow your nose again.  And realize your are grateful for your life.  All of it. Even with all the sad-stuffed-up-nose-self-doubt-poking-at-ya-head-stuffed-with-junk that comes along with it!

You load up the DVD player with a movie, grab the remote and press play.

So, how are you feeling about your life?
Grateful for anything today?


1 comment:

  1. Hello!

    Great post, we all have alot to be thankful for. I'm your newest follower from the Blog Hop and thanks for hosting.

    Lillies & Silk


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