September 13, 2012


This morning when I awoke, I decided that today I would not do any blogging and this post was not even suppose to be a post.  As a matter of love, it started off as an email to a fellow blogger.  A fellow blogger I've grown fond of from the UK.  I  wanted to share with her what an inspiring morning I had just experienced.  Her name is Sarah.  Sarah Evans of A Cat-Like Curiosity.  She has no idea about this post.  I did not advise her nor did I ever  sent her the email I intended to send her this morning.  

I pondered long and hard before I actually decided to go ahead with this post because it entailed revealing a tender moment about myself.  It entailed raw emotions.  It meant putting my heart in my hands for everyone to see.  

So why did I go ahead and publish this post?  

Because it is my truth.  It is a wonderful and inspiring experience that I wanted to share with the whole world.  I want to hide my feelings no more.  I want to write about my life as it is, as it happens, good and bad.  I want to be honest with myself.  I want to live my truth.  

 I also want to clarify that in no way is this a spotlight feature or a blog promotional.  It is just my sharing of an experience.  My truth.  No filters. Simply Me.  It's a heartfelt tribute to another soul who deserves it. 

The email I never sent:

Oh Sarah, oh Sarah, 
You will never know just how much your beautiful spirit has touched me this morning, but I will try my very best to voice my feelings so that you will know.

As you know I recently relocated back home to Miami, Florida due to my Motherly strings being daughters cried out for help and my heart could NOT refuse.  My eldest started a Photography business incorporating her professional hair-styling and professional make-up artistry.  The business is blooming and she needs my help with her little ones as well as in the business.  My youngest is a sophomore in the University and also needed my support.    In Kansas I had a well paying job in a very prestigious Hospital with excellent benefits that allowed me to save some money as a cushion.  At the same time I was exploring my dream of writing via my blog PonderWonders and was excited!

Needless to say, I took a leap of faith and relocated.  I am now living with my eldest sharing a room with my 2 G-daughters.  The room is big enough so that I have my own queen bed and I have set up my laptop where every morning I have easy access to.  In a way, it is like a dream coming true for me because now that I have no job, I have the freedom to blog more and at the same time intertwine my dreams with my daughters' dreams.  

The thing is this:  I am starting to get anxious feelings that I need to get a full time job.  Also, I have been investing a lot of my time on my blog lately, writing more posts regularly, working guest posts (have not forgotten about yours), seeing to unfinished projects, etc., etc.  But, lately my daughters have been implying that I am on my blog too much, even saying that I'm addicted to blogging.  I am starting to doubt my dreams of writing again and that maybe it's just not in the cards for me.  I sometimes think that the writers' train came by along time ago and I missed it.   At times I also fear my monies will run out and I will have to depend on my daughters....which is something I will NOT and do NOT want to happen.  I know it may seem silly.  But that is how I feel...sometimes.  Not all the time.  But that is how I was feeling this morning.

Anyhow, just this morning I was telling my daughter how today I was not going to blog at all.  I was just gonna dedicate my time searching for jobs on the Internet but, sometimes God has other plans.  So I peeked at my blogs list and saw your post snippet below: 

I was soooo happy for you Sarah!  Way to go mi Amiga!  I went ahead and read your essay and KA-POW!!!  Something magical happened!  Here is the point I am trying to convey.  I copied and pasted below the words that were like daggers through my heart:

"Instead of a do-over, how about a move over? Don’t like your job? Inch by inch, move over to something you like more.  Don’t like your body? Step by step, move over to a better body place for you. Move over darling!  (*Doris Day music optional*).

Move over darling! Be fickle, be conscience free, be you. Just the you that’s over where you want you to be.

Move over darling! Be fulfilled, be creative, be you. Just the you who has achieved your hearts desire.

Now, you may be sitting there thinking to yourself “Really? It’s really that simple is it?”

And I would say to you this: YES. IT. IS.

Is it easy? No. In order to even begin on your move over your dream life you will work harder than you ever have before. You will become almost entirely obsessed. You will neglect your friends and family sometimes. You will have to apologise for this. A lot. You will have times when you are completely exhausted. When you wonder if it’s worth it after all.

It’s worth it. Believe me. Keep movin’ on over."

You may be in a position where you can afford to give up your current job and re-train entirely to get to where you want to go. If that sounds like you, then what are you waiting for? You’re so very lucky to be in that position. You should have started to work towards your dream yesterday! Get out there and get movin’ on over."

Sarah, your whole essay spoke to me, but the above words resonated my soul, ESPECIALLY the words in green! Just this morning I was thinking of giving up! At risk of looking silly or viewed as a crazy or creepy woman, I will be true, bold and open up my heart to you mi Amiga. I have attached a visual of exactly how your words moved me!  You can see it for yourself because there really aren't any words to describe what your essay did for me.  I just ask that you please do not share them since they are for your eyes only.  I have never shared of myself like this with anyone, especially someone I've never personally met, but I believe in my heart of all hearts that you were put in my path to help me in my journey.  Ya know, God does send Angels your way.  

Thank you Sarah for reminding me that I am worth it!  Thank you from the bottom of my heart! 


There you have it.  The email I never sent.  My truth.  I am a sensitive soul.  I have an exquisite sensitivity to other peoples feelings.  Sometimes I am misunderstood as being a "Drama Queen" (*in my most sho'nuff voice) which for many years upset me and kept me from expressing my feelings.  But I do not care anymore of what others think of me.  What matters is what I think and believe of myself.  I am strong, beautiful and I am led by love.  I LOVE to love.  That is who I am.  

Unedited.  Stripped. Me.


  1. Oh sweetheart, thank-you for being so willing to share this with us all. This is one of most beautiful, thought-provoking posts I've read in quite awhile and I'm so glad that you have someone in your path that inspires you in such a way tremendous way!

    1. Hola Anita!
      I appreciate YOU and your kind and loving words. Thanks! :)

  2. Love love love this post! Thank you for sharing...had a similar experience of doubt about my art career last week. You have inspired ME now!!! I love your blog your heart and YOU! Xoxo

    1. Hola Tam!
      Thank you so very much for your kind words! I'm happy to have inspired you! :D

  3. Mayra you are awesome! I am so pleased my little essay has kept you on track to achieve your dreams. That's EXACTLY why I wrote it! Wow! I am just kinda speechless to be honest. This shout out is the most awesome shout out I have ever ever had. If you check my blog today you may well see a certain ad all renewed (for the next 6 months in fact) just for a certain somebody....



    1. Hola Sarah!
      Thank you so very much! I really appreciate YOU!

      ~SimplyyMayra :)

  4. Oh lovely! Now you made me cry! Thank You for sharing this it is so beautiful. I promise you that everything good/bad happens for a reason. I've been told by my family that I spend too much time blogging, but it's part of me. In a strange way it completes me and I'm not going to give that up. You have to find the balance. Writing is your dream so blogging is very important, but family is important too. You don't have to blog every day. Why not take a week from blogging and write a constructive list about how your going to reach your writing goals. If you really feel like you need to get a full-time job (I'm in the same situation) then do. Just because you're working it doesn't mean your dreams have to be put on hold. We should all work hard for our families, ourselves and financial security, but we should work harder for what we really believe in.
    Sorry for this becoming an essay rather than a comment :)

    1. Hola Helen!
      No need to apologize...I love to hear from my readers! Thank you so much for your lovely words of encouragement! I appreciate YOU mi Amiga!

      ~SimplyyMayra :D

  5. This was specially beautiful. So inspiring that you would share such a deep intimate moment with all of us. I agree with Anita ^


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